CROSSING THE LINE
On line I can woo you
embed you and peruse you
But our little digital heaven
must end each night by twenty to eleven
Crossing the line, on your website or mine?
{six-four, athletic, one ninety!}
Cross that line, mix your font with mine
{5-9, statuesque beauty!}
It isn't really cheating
if we don't really plan on meeting
If we don't count dividing our passions
We're still loyal spouses, after a fashion
Cross that line, when we're together online
Ok, now I kiss you
cross that line, you're ten gigs of fine
Ok, now I spank you
Our relationship is quite real
though I wouldn't know you from a seal
We always type to mutual elation
Because you never beg off due to constipation
Who said they mind, your spouse or mine?
Ok, I'll delete her!
(fade...)
.........
Comments (25)
I think that should be used in a movie about guys fighting online war simulators.
F*cking Excellent, Bro! This piece is Net-weight after cooking; 'all zingers'. Just plain loved it.
Reminds me of a era during which I came home from work every night to exchange innuenda with a girl from Austin State. We called it TWOH. 'Typing with one hand'. Innocent fun. She never missed an on-line period on my account. And I pumped her full of exclamation points.
@jsolberg - Thanks, but you know I only write these ditties in order to read the gems you pen in response.
G., I need to be honest with you. I'm only 5' 5''.
Wish you'd post this over there....
@Kellsbella - Old Phil Ossifer said once, " 'tis better to have loved a short girl than never to have loved a tall."
Oh, and thanks mucho for the inspiration, gorgeous.
fun stuff!!
@jsolberg - pumped her full of exclamation points! hilarious.
Really funny. This reminds me of conversations we used to have when I worked at the phone company. Everyone was so bored, and one thing that many did was write notes to each other full of inuendo and flirtations. Of course it was all fun and games until a spouse or girlfriend found out and then it turned into a lot of fast explainations and false promises of never doing it again. We sat in 5 sided pods with a big empty space in the middle. Sometimes those note weren't so carefully tossed, so they ended up in this empty space. My friend Cheri was having a "note relationship" with Bill. She was married at the time. There were also several other women who wanted Bill to be their "pen pal". Cheri was worried that one of them would find the notes and tell her husband and then they could entice Bill away. So one weekend when the office was closed, Cheri and I went up so she could crawl into the middle space and get those notes back. There were probably about 20 of them by this time! She got them just in time...the next week the company put formica tops on these spaces to make it look better. (Upper management must have been planning a visit.)
@joiwinds - Thanks for the funny story, baby.
@joiwinds - Fascinating. I read till the end, only then to note who wrote it. You remind me that I do write here fully prepared for any of the 17 women who assume they own me, bless their hearts, to read 'n not weep. Remind me in a good way. Your keeping this guy, and his blog, alive back during the 'heart-thing' (sorry, medical jargon) made a huge impression on me. If I'm in that situation, I'd probably have a coronary just trying to schedule the visits of the warring parties.
'Who are *you*?'
"No, girl, who the hell are you?"
"Sorry, I asked first."
@Kellsbella - I just measured and 5'-5" is do-able.
@MelFamy - Those gems aren't as expensive as one might think. After I discovered your site I purchased an Economy hundred-pak. Only half used up. Keep writing.
@jsolberg - "the 17 women who assume they own me, bless their hearts" - Now you're sounding like Bricker59.
I was once 6'4", 190 lbs. But no one ever accused me of an athletic build, although I'm pretty good at ping-pong.
My first girlfriend was 5'0". The relationship didn't last long enough for it to become an issue.
I worked with some guys who would go onto lesbian chat rooms for fun. The interesting thing was when they'd start hitting on each other by mistake.
@Roadkill_Spatula - Oh no! I struggle to think of a specimen I'm *less* keen on resembling.
I shall see to the matter at once, on pain of painful death.
@jsolberg - Do-able? Quite frankly, I'm wary that your heart couldn't handle the lime green, luv. Perhaps, the purple? I'll be whatever color you desire....
@jsolberg - Sounds like you are a popular man! Watch out...that can be taxing on a heart, I hear.
@Kellsbella - I tried to reply to you on rio norte but it wouldn't let me. So just let me say, I ain't worried!
@joiwinds - It's cause M. knows you're up to no good! I think you just need to start butterin him up. Isn't that your preferred lubricant? Don't worry, our little secret is safe with me. Shhh....G. may be in the vicinity....
@Kellsbella - no, M. will just have to butter himself up. I'm not doing it. He and I have already had words before and I found him to be even more stubborn than B. and nowhere near as nice. Actually the reason has something to do with me trying to sign up so I could get an avitar and it really messed something up. No big loss.
@joiwinds - I went through that gravatar.com site. I think that's what it is...I think what's nutty is that you can have all these different websites which seems to complicate things. Honestly, computer stuff confuses me.
That's interesting what you think of M. See, I find B. to be far more annoying. I suppose we just clash...
@Kellsbella - I wonder what colors Yoni would see if looked at you and B?
@MelFamy - I believe Kells would be in a raging red staring at B. in a bombastic black.
hahahahaha.... well done.
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